2011

July, 2011
Conception

Throughout history up until the recent past. There have been definite roles men and women for the most part. Sons and daughters would follow in the path of their parents. By carrying on the family traditions. Within the last century, especially inside the last couple of generations. The way people meet, interact, and correspond has changed society drastically. Lines are blurred when it comes to dating/courting. My personal experience, has been listening to gripes and complaints of single women. Why can’t I find a guy that will treat me right. There are no good guys left. I ask is there a so called perfect person? No I do not believe there is, yet what I do believe is. One person can be perfect for another.

Allow me to ask you a question. Is your present lifestyle catering to your ultimate goal in life? Are your attitude and actions catapulting you to the chosen results? If you slightly liked a sports team. You might see part of a game as your flipping through the channels. Not really going out of your way to follow the team. Then you see a commercial for open tryouts the next morning. You get the idea because you like to watch the team that’s why you want to try out. You know next to nothing about the sport its self, even less about the positions in what they mean, or a hint of the rules.

How well is your tryout is going to be? Do you feel you’ll be sufficiently prepared? Is your knowledge, skill, experiences equally matching to theirs that are already on the team. You might be thinking to yourself. Why would someone tryout for something that they know absolutely nothing about? That is my point, and yet men and women tackle the dating scene the very same way. Knowing very little of what they want, where to find it, and even less in what to do once they have obtained it. Then getting angry and becoming bitter because the result was less than positive. The great and positive thing about dating (looking for a marriage partner) is you are in control. Another Example: Wanting to look your best (women). Would you blindly go to any store to buy your cosmetics, spackle it on, and hope for the best? Of course not, you are taking your time towards every everything. First you are going to find out what kind of skin you have, oily or dry. Then pick a foundation a powder or liquid base. Making sure it is hypoallergenic if you have sensitive skin. With the list going on with, earrings, a purse, and shoes!

Getting back to the title of Conception. Having the understanding of what you want is the most critical point of any brilliant plan. The intelligence of making the right decisions starts with you and what your future. If you were to go into a sales meeting and you were bargaining for your life. Would you go in unprepared? I would hope you would go in with all the fact and data you needed. Plus, knowing what you would want to and how to navigate towards your best interests. Plus, knowing with certainty what you would be willing to compromise. Know what you want and be selective about in where to achieve it. You wouldn’t go to an exclusive hardware store looking for bread, or milk.

Forming your future relationship needs to take time, effort, and energy. You and you alone have the power to make the right decisions. The type of person you want in your life reflects and represents you.

What is truly stopping you from moving forward? Is self doubt, lack of opportunity, insufficient information, entitlement, stopping you? Do you need a circle of support, or are you simply unmotivated? As men and women, we all need to take responsibility for our own actions. Now is the time to stand up for what you want. Claim or reclaim the respect you not only deserve, you command.

I need to ask the question. What type of partner are you looking for? Are you living the life that your ideal partner has? What type of partner you’re seeking? Are you that person perfect match

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July 2011
A New Baby

This is a rhetorical expression for a new relationship. As we all know, a pregnancy takes a lot of time and effort in getting ready not only for the big day, but also being geared up and properly equipped after the day arrives. I am not trying to make light of the wondrous miracle of child birth. A new relationship should be viewed the same way. Delicate, precious, full of opportunity, and promising.

What I’m indicating is an essential part of (getting in) a relationship. There should be a check list of attributes you want, characteristics you’re willing to work with, and certain addictions/behaviors you’ll not tolerate. Knowing this ahead of time, will not only help in the short term? It will save so much heartache and disappointment in the future. Thinking to yourself, why would any one want me? Or, there’s no one out there that’s perfect. I completely agree, no one is perfect! Yet, I do believe certain people are perfect for each other.

You might be thinking to yourself. I don’t know what I want. I’m not sure what I am looking for. And that’s Okay. You can start with a list of what you don’t want. People say success isn’t all about knowing what to do. It’s more important knowing what not to do that breeds success. Writing down on paper whatever comes to mind what you don’t want in a marriage partner. Take your time and really think about what you don’t want. This isn’t a race to run through. This is the rest of your life! I don’t encourage you to fly through or have a lazy attitude about life. I’m talking about your future! Looks all change over time. It’s who they are as a person, what their beliefs, behaviors are, and how we view life that changes very little.

What are some critical qualities that are vital to the lifestyle you want to lead? Is charity work important? Are they compassionate, do they have integrity. Are they someone who knows how to fix things? Are they sensitive, romantic or what of a specific moral fiber? Write out a core list you want in your life. Once your exhaustive list is created, cut the list down to it’s barest essentials. Possibly a handful of traits, be realistic about your list. I understand that when you’re (young), the list is long. Then as you get older. The list is drastically cut down to breathing. To know certain qualities and traits from the start, will put you ahead of the process. The best visual analogy is when you go grocery shopping. You have a detailed list or at least have a solid grasp of the items that you want. You know where the store is located. You may not know what isle certain items are on. But you are in the right place. Why can’t looking for a partner be the same way? Being proactive, rather than reactive is better. Knowing what your getting into and being prepared, is better than frantically trying to figure out how to get out of it!

Taking the time, effort, and energy wisely spent now. It will save you frustration, anguish, and misery later on down the road. Also having the added benefit of being confident in who you are looking for. Don’t waste weeks or even up to years finding out that a person isn’t right for you. Take the time to focus on what’s important to you and the lifestyle that you want to lead.

Getting back to my original thought of being knowledgeable and prepared for the future! Before you go out and get what you want. You need to obtaining all the information possible, knowing how to handle different circumstances and events. Which would give you the best line of defense. So when something uncertain arises, you will have the emotional firmness in your carefully selected choices. Giving you that wisdom and depth in your confidence for the directions you want in life. Allowing yourself to receive such a precious gift like that, wouldn’t only be a behavioral difference in your daily routine, it’s literally life changing. Being self-assured in your own destiny will allow you to concentrate on more fulfilling life goals. How well you prepare today, that’s how ready you will be tomorrow!

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